Valentines Day

I WAS going to write a long introduction as to why this post is being brought to you today, but I am running low on time, and it is vitally important that this post goes up soon.
Here's the short version: My mom told me that I have to clean my room unless I can get a super hot date. Not very many guys actually know how overly qualified I am as a girlfriend. This is a problem when it comes to dating, so I have compiled a list of my very best qualities to make this whole thing easier. I took a nap today instead of writing this post, so gents, you only have a couple of hours.

1. I can cook anything that comes frozen in a box with easy-to-understand cooking instructions.
2. I have 20-20 vision.
3. I have good personal hygiene.
4. My boyfriend would never have to worry about me being hit on by other guys.
5. I have soft hair.
6. There are three languages that I can amost speak in.
7. I am an animal lover- an by that I mean that I really just love cats. meow.
8. I am an amateur ukulele player.
9. If I jump, I can touch ceilings that are a standard distance from the floor (excellent for spider killing).
10. I can provide exclusive commentary on movies while watching them.
11. I can clean certain things if properly motivated.
12. I have seen every season of every good show on Netflix.
13. I am employed at a fast food restaraunt.
14. I don't have to be home until 9:00 on week nights.

It is February 14th, and I just gave you 14 good reasons to show up at my house holding a boom box over your head.

Hallway Etiquette: Perfecting the Stop

As a high schooler of almost two years, I think I can pretty much call myself a seasoned expert in all things hallway-traffic. Since very early on this year, I have been thinking of ways to prevent hallway catastrophes across the globe, so I will be writing Hallway Etiquette installments every once in awhile, in hopes of making our hallways safer places to walk.



The Stop: Although this may seem like a very simple task, it has proven to be quite difficult for most. There are two problems here:
    1. One's inability to warn others when ceasing forward movement.
    2. Other's inability to see that someone in front of them is obviously no longer moving forward.

Also this happens constantly:

A warning could have given this poor blue circle enough time to find an alternate route. Instead, as it often goes, it probably smacked into the dot in front of it, receiving some unwarranted dirty looks from his whole group of circular friends.

Also, two solutions:
    1. Follow the diagram below and learn how to make a quality stop.
    2. Learn to detect early warning signs of mid-hallway stopping.

High jazz hands are also widely accepted.

 How to know if an uneducated hallway-stopping enthusiast is going to stop:

Vocal Signs: Oh! My shoe is untied, I guess I'd better tie it right here in the middle of this hallway; Achoo!; I think I'll stop now; I've got a cramp from all this extensive hallway walking!; I'm having a seizure, heart attack, brain aneurysm, ect.; I think here is a good place to stop for lunch.
There are many, and it is best if you expand your stop vocabulary before entering highly populated hallways.

Physical Signs: This one is harder because the uneducated tend to stop without visual warning of any kind. With this, it is best to just stay a couple feet behind, be prepared to stop at any moment, and try to go around them quickly if you see them waving at a group of people directly in front of them.

I am very passionate about this issue, and I will not stop until basic rules of the road are implemented in schools everywhere. Don't walk uneducated.

Working Woman.

Today I start work. I'm actually really excited because at some point, I will rolling in green. I'm also really nervous because people scare me. Food services are generally people-based. The good news is that this babalicious babe will be working with me. Not today though. They want to train us separately so we'll actually learn something.

Hopefully I won't cut off any important fingers or anything on my first day. There's definitely a possibility that I may slip and die, though. I've been making this blog post instead of buying non-slip shoes, but at least I'll have a post to prove I thought about it.

And now I leave you with this.